


Impulse

by Lozza342



Series: Powerful Jealousy [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Arguing, Break Up, Crying, Drinking to Cope, Falling Out of Love, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Misunderstandings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Prologue, Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 15:36:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17727977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lozza342/pseuds/Lozza342
Summary: Kageyama Tobio and Kindaichi Yuutarou had been going out for years. Up until a few months ago, their relationship was stable and everything they both wanted.The growing tension may have been in no small part to the growing gap in success, nor the way Kageyama struggled saying what he meant. Ultimately it's only Kindaichi that it hurts, the more volatile and impulsive of the two.Perhaps it would've been fairer to admit sooner - Kageyama fell out of love with Kindaichi a long time ago.Prologue to a series I'm currently working on.





	Impulse

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally going to be a prequel of some sort after the other work but it works out better this way. The rest of this series so far is very much fragmented and a little unsure, so the rest of it shall be very slow coming out.
> 
> Either way, enjoy this little prologue. Both boys deserve to be happy, so I hope you stick around to see that perhaps they both will, however long it takes (sorry Kindaichi)!
> 
> Please comment if you liked it (or didn't), it's the only way I can improve!

“You’re late!”

Kindaichi shut the door behind him and slumped against it with a long sigh. “I'm sorry, my boss called me in again…”

“What did you do this time?”

“Why do you always think it's my fault?!”

He hadn't even got his shoes off and here he was being yelled at before he knew all the facts.

“Kindaichi, it  _ is _ always your fault.”

Kindaichi kept his anger in check, only using slightly more force than necessary to toe off his shoes and barge past Kageyama.

“How is it my fault that rumours get spread about me? I would never say something like that!”

Kageyama followed him into the kitchen, arms crossed like a disappointed father. “Like what?”

The words would taste foul. He couldn't possibly say that to his co-worker, let alone his partner. “...Don't ask…”

“How do  _ I _ know you didn't say it?”

“Seriously?! Do you have no faith in me at all?”

Even though Kindaichi always found the way Kageyama occasionally had to stop to think about something quite endearing, now it just pissed him off. He had just been suspended for something he didn't do and here his own boyfriend was, doubting him. If Kageyama couldn't believe him, who would?

“I'm just  _ saying _ . It's your word against theirs.” Kageyama said. He wasn't wrong, but he didn't have to say it in that tone, said through gritted teeth and bitten back anger.

The air was always heavy when Kindaichi got home, no more of the airy and comfortable atmosphere like it was just a few months ago. He couldn't tell what was going on but he could tell that whatever it was was prying open a gap between them, in turn testing Kindaichi's patience.

“Yeah, you don't think I know that?” He sighed dejectedly.

Him and Kageyama were close. At times it felt like they were connected emotionally, times when their feelings ebbed and flowed between them. It made the sex amazing but the arguments just as, if not more heated.

They hadn't had sex in months.

Kindaichi took Kageyama out a few weeks ago (usually it was the other way around). He paid for everything, even knowing Kageyama's expensive tastes and his own lack of money. It was nice and all but not as nice as when Kageyama used to take him out, and when Kindaichi went to kiss him at the end of the night, Kageyama turned his head.

Perhaps it was something he said or did that night, Kindaichi had stewed on it since it happened. It didn't stop Kageyama giving him a small kiss on the cheek when he left for work in the mornings and it made him flustered every time without fail. He loved Kageyama and would take anything. A press of lips was plenty enough to get him motivated as he would wave him off with a wide smile. Kageyama never smiled back.

“I cooked dinner. Yours is warming in the oven.”

Kindaichi's chest swelled with pride. Kageyama was always so thoughtful. “Thanks!”

Kageyama was good at many things. His job, for one. Since he left college, he had instantly landed a job at a local company that began to bloom. Kindaichi had never been prouder to call Kageyama his boyfriend at that time. He got bonuses and promotions very quickly. He was a complete natural. No doubt his calm and calculated demeanor and his thirst for achievement was a huge factor in that.

Kindaichi was good at one thing. Disappointment. So, naturally everything he did came to nothing. Since leaving college he had had many different jobs, usually doing unconventional hours and earning very little in the way of money. This meant he was entirely dependent on Kageyama for food and somewhere to stay. He didn't know where he would be without him so he was eternally thankful. But nonetheless a disappointment even to him.

It took a while to work up the courage to tell him he had been suspended and when he did, stood uneasily in the living room, sweaty hands wringing together, Kageyama shouted again. Kindaichi hated when he shouted, because he shouted back and they wouldn't stop until both of them were blue-faced and he was crying.

-

“I’m doing the best I can! Why can't you see that?! So, I have nothing to show for it, no-one ever gives me a chance! Not even you!”

“I’ve given you plenty of chances, Kindaichi! You've blown every single one! And if you're doing your best, then obviously you're just not good enough!”

It pierced Kindaichi's heart to hear him say that. He knew it deep down, that he would never be good enough. He was a loser and sucked at everything he did and he couldn't hold a job. They had all been said at one point or another, by previous employers or co-workers that spread untrue allegations. Kageyama was the one person who never used to say those things. Up until a few weeks ago.

What can someone do if their best isn't good enough? He always did overtime, worked himself into the ground and for what? To be told he was some kind of pervert? He didn't even like women and he couldn't even say or he'd be chucked out on principle  _ anyway _ !

“Tobio, y-you really think that?”

“At this point you're a charity case and nothing more! You can't even  _ cook  _ for yourself!”

Now that was just uncalled for.

“ _ Excuse  _ me?!”

“Don't use that tone with me, Kindaichi!”

“That's the only tone you deserve to hear!”

Shit. Why like this? Every night they had one argument or another and he couldn't take it, constantly nursing a headache brought on by tears and shouting.

Kageyama wasn't done but Kindaichi tuned out his voice while he grabbed his coat and keys, stopping to wipe his eyes over and over.

“Where do you think you're going?!”

“Out! What, are you a dumbass, what does it look like?!”

“ _ You're _ the dumbass!”

Kindaichi made an unamused snort. Kageyama used to call him that with fondness, kind eyes and soft hands enveloping him in warmth as they drifted off together in postcoital bliss. To hear it said in such a tone defeated him.

“Don't wait up.”

“I wasn't going to.”

The door slammed behind him, rattling in his ears.

“Love you.” He mumbled as he made his way to the nearest bar, sniffling in devastation.

-

Kageyama had trouble with saying things he didn't mean, he had always known that. It was the reason he had no-one. Kindaichi was the last person to stick by him, and even he was slowly but surely slipping from his grasp. He hated it when Kindaichi cried. He looked so small and hurt the way his head dipped and Kageyama never knew what to do. In the past, it was enough to just hold him, but Kindaichi had already gone.

He was left shaking, less with anger and more with fear. Kindaichi was going to come back right? He had to! He wouldn't make it alone.

“I’m sorry, Yuutarou.”

And so the pacing started. Kindaichi liked to drink but it changed him. Everything about him was magnified and depending on his mood, he could be the sweetest thing in the world or a ball of pent-up stress and anger. Kageyama wasn't certain of many things, but he was certain that Kindaichi would need space tonight.

After a few beats of his worried heart, Kageyama dialled a recently acquired number on his phone. “Hey, it's me.”

“Oh, wow! Kageyama! You  _ do _ know how a phone works!”

“Of course I know how a phone works, dumbass!”

There was a cute giggle on the other end of the line, one that made his heart swell.

“I’ve had an argument with my b- _ significant other _ , could I stay over at yours?”

“Kageyama has a girlfriend?!”

“Shut up, idiot!”

“Of course you can. You have my address, right?”

“Yeah… Thanks, Hinata.”

“He knows how to show gratitude too!”

Kageyama touched his chin. “Gratitude…?”

The hyperactive redhead had already terminated the call while Kageyama figured out what Hinata said was yet another insult. Instead of anger, though, Kageyama felt something a lot more wholesome, like the feeling Kindaichi used to ignite.

Kageyama didn't bother leaving a note as he left his apartment with a change of clothes. It might have been a little petty, but he didn't dwell on it. If Kindaichi wanted to try and drink away his problems, let him try.


End file.
